We have had 2 more visits since my last post! Mid week we went to see the kids for a few hours in the evening. I really should have posted, because the visits are starting to blur together and I am definitely losing the details in my mind which I absolutely hate. We played games with the kids and played “cooking the yellow turkey in the kitchen” and played dress up.
Today we visited with them all day! We attended church with them this morning…. both kids were incredibly well behaved! I sat next to Daffy so it was definitely easier to monitor her interest level which honestly seemed quite high. I couldn’t wait to get to the “Our Father” so we could hold hands. 🙂 During the closing song, she leaned over and whispered “Will Donald and I share a room at your house?”….. one of several comments made today that made me realize they are looking towards the future. Anyway, we explained she would room with Tinkerbell and Donald will room with Pluto.
We went back to their home and Donald, Daffy & Pluto headed out for a run. Mickey, Tinkerbell & myself stayed behind for some pre-placement training. This was one of my favorite parts of the day because 2 of the the Fairy Godmothers shared some insight into the kids about their thoughts on us. Daffy told one of the Fairy Godmothers that she has always had dreams where God has let her know if a family is THE Forever Family for her & Donald. In the past he has said no, but last week she dreamt he told her we ARE her Forever Family. It seems like this has given her great peace. In speaking with the other Fairy Godmother, Daffy expressed that she is still nervous that we wont like her because the other families didnt (not true, of course, but her perception), but she did also say that she enjoys us coming and enjoys the kids. She also said she believes that when Mickey comes home from work or they come home from school that he will hug them. This is HUGE! Watching the way the kids interact with Mickey has been magical!!! He has quite a dry sense of humor and in general, I would not consider him a cuddly or affectionate person. The thing is, they have no preconceived notions of him and they both are VERY fond of him…. climbing all over him, hugging him, etc. I truly could not be happier that they are able to connect to him and separate him from the abuse that occurred in their past. Donald’s thought process was a lot more on the details and logistics…. wondering how he will know what the rules at our house are…. wondering if his bedroom will be close to the bathroom, etc. I think most of those concerns will be addressed as we work further in the transition.
Once the kids returned, we ate lunch, played in the sandbox and then headed out for a bike ride together. Considering I hadnt ridden a bike in probably 6 years, I thought I did well. They were very confident. We rode to a nearby playground and stayed for an hour or so.
Back at their home, we played in the yard for quite a while. We made pyramids of people, took lots of pictures, the boys played basketball and us girls played soccer. It gave us a great chance to connect. I was in heaven every time Daffy and Donald hugged me. At one point, Tinkerbell asked why they needed so many hugs and the best answer I could give was that they are 70,000 hugs behind schedule for their ages. They are making up for lost time.
Mickey cooked dinner and we ate together. Its funny because we have never placed a great deal of importance on family meals. I think of our relationships ats strong and with such busy lives, it never seemed to be a high priority. That said, the meals we have shared have given us some time to really get to know eachother in an informal setting and I can definitely see the value in continuing to make meals important once they are finally home with us.
Having a long ride home is always beneficial for us because it gives us a great chance to process the visits and discuss anything that came up, our insights, things we noticed that others might not have, etc. Pluto mentioned that during dinner Daffy was staring at a picture we brought that had been taken the first day we met. She makes my heart smile!
This week we have several meeting pertaining to the transition plan and are eager to get more visits scheduled including the kids finally coming to our house and even sleepovers! It’s so strange for me to think we only met them for the first time 11 days ago…. but then I think back to the birth of my biological children and I certainly couldn’t have loved them anymore than I did at 11 days old either.
I am so blessed. I can’t stop smiling! I wish I could hold this feeling with me every day of my life!
[All names have (obviously) been changed to protect the privacy of our family.]