A few random updates from the trenches…
It’s been an up and down week for Donald. He did not return phone calls Friday or Saturday. He did not call on his “call day” (Monday). He screamed at me with disgust on Tuesday that he didn’t want to talk to me . Yesterday we had a pleasant conversation that lasted a whopping 13 minutes. In fact, he talked to Daffy (at her request) and told her he loved her as they hung… the very first time he said that to her since he left at the end of January. Weird.
Donald’s birth mom visited with him last week and reported that things seemed different. She said he hadn’t acted as loving as he had at prior visits and that she felt he was conflicted. She & I are currently trying to schedule a visit together with him so we can have an open dialogue about what his hopes for the future are. We feel like he tells each of us what we want to hear and are hopeful that if he sees us as united for him that he will be able to finally be honest.
As far as I know, no therapy has been set up for Donald yet. As much as I feel his case worker understands his needs, I feel that there is no sense of urgency for him now that his sister is being adopted. I have no leg to stand on as his “former foster mom”, but feel that a fire needs to be lit to encourage the state to work to get him help and get him to permanency. I will definitely be bringing this up at the next team meeting in September.
Daffy starts school in 6 days. She isn’t thrilled to be going back, but I feel like she really needs it (not that she has a choice, LOL). She does so much better with tasks to complete than with an abundance of free time.
She is extremely excited about her birthday party tomorrow! I have some concerns that this could be a very overwhelming day for her with so many people here for her, but I am going to try to keep things light and positive. Mickey and I made the decision to allow a phone conversation between her birth mom and herself next week on her actual birthday. Her birth mom has been very appropriate and I am confident that she will not do anything to destroy the relationship we (birth mom & I) have been carefully building with her.
I learned Wednesday that Alice is being evaluated at a psychiatric hospital and her next destination is unclear at this time. I’m disappointed that things did not go in a different direction, but I guess I shouldn’t be surprised since respite didn’t “save” us either. If Alice does return to her foster home, we will be ready and willing to support them.
Other posts currently in the works: My Adoption Story Part IV and an update on Tink, so check back soon! 🙂